It sounds like something you’d hear Carson Kressley say, but no, it’s a lesson my 7-year old son taught me this morning at the bus stop.
You see, it’s been a pleasure to dress him up until the last few days. Sometime between last Wednesday, and this Wednesday, he’s developed that thing we moms dread the most… an opinion.
Any mom will tell you that the day their kids developed an opinion about their clothing is the day that everything became more complicated. Sara’s son went through a stage where he would only wear a shirt if it had a ball on the front of it. It didn’t matter what kind of ball: baseball, basketball, football – as long as it had a ball, it would pass inspection. But God forbid she try to pull something over his head that didn’t possess a ball emblem because there would be hell to pay.
This morning, my son was wearing his favorite Nike athletic shirt. He loves it. But in his usual nature, he spazzed out while running past me and I was carrying my morning cup of Earl Grey Tea. He ran into me and spilled my cup of hot tea all over his shirt. Of course this happened approximately 60 seconds before the bus was scheduled to appear. I raced upstairs and grabbed the first thing I could get my hands on, which was a brand new Abercrombie and Fitch shirt. He’s never worn it before, but I figured how could you go wrong with Abercrombie? He’d happily put it on and we’d make it to the bus.
To my surprise, he was not happy. His sister and I began trying to convince him that Abercrombie was very cool and hip and that the shirt looked great on him. He wasn’t buying it. I wasn’t in the mood to drive kids to school this morning, or to go back up the stairs for the fourth time, so he was going to wear it or go shirtless (I’m totally serious). We polled all the kids at the bus stop (some older and therefore with more influence) and they all agreed and told Timmy that yes indeed this was a very cool shirt. He finally put on his cotton jacket and zipped it up the front, totally hiding the expensive Abercrombie shirt. The jacket is brown with a large navy cursive logo that clearly red OshKosh. I just couldn’t let that go, “Timmy,” I said, “That jacket is made by OshKosh. They make clothes for babies and toddlers. You’re in second grade. That’s what you should have a problem with, not the shirt.” He very confidently said, (with a smurky kind of laugh attached) “Mommy, nobody in second grade can read cursive yet.” And that was that. The bus came, I was laughing too hard to argue any further and my child was warm and fully clothed even if he wasn’t completely happy about it. Lesson learned.
Stephanie Triplett is the author of The Mommy Chronicles: Conversations Sharing the Comedy and Drama of Pregnancy and New Motherhood (Hay House, 2005) and The Must-Have Mom Manual (Ballantine/Random House, April 2009) available at TARGET October 11th!